‘As I look at the amount of individual, relationship and world violence around me, I feel a great sense of urgency.  Anger is a part of nature that can’t be denied but needs to be worked with.  Too many people suffer from their own anger, others’ anger, and from an angry world.

The power behind anger, utilised with awareness, could change the world.’ (p10)​

- Dr Gary Reiss

‘Anger is energy.  It is power.  Like the power of the atom or the power of knowledge, it can be used for creative or destructive purposes.  Anger is part of nature, and we cannot wish it away.  Instead, we can learn how to use this energy to create healthy bodies, healthy relationships, and a healthy world’. (p8)
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‘Anger is neither sin nor pathology, but a powerful human emotion that can fall anywhere on the spectrum from highly creative to highly destructive, from totally ethical to completely unethical.  It can be a sign of pathology or health, a sign of lack of spiritual development or enlightenment.    The key to using anger well is awareness, including the awareness we bring to our anger and how we bring anger into relationships and into the larger world beyond ourselves’.  (p10-11)
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‘It is interesting to note that couples usually come to the therapist either when there is extreme anger in the relationship or when there are no feelings present, and sometimes these two issues are related’ (p68)
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‘Anger responses from being in power and being oppressed are very different, and mastering anger in both situations is crucial.

Those on top need to be aware of how they use their anger.  They have so much power in their position that the anger they send has the extra rocket power of rank attached to it.  For example, think of a parent angry with a child - a drop of anger from the parental position can be enough to launch the child into tears.  In addition, the work of those on top is to open up to and accept some of the anger of the oppressed, knowing that the rank of being on top sets off much of this anger, and that sometimes rage is all the oppressed side has left.

Those of lower rank face the challenge of knowing when and how to speak up in a way that doesn’t lead to unexpected retaliation…. The oppressed are challenged to bring out their anger is a way that wakes up the other side, if this is their goal.  This takes a great deal of feedback awareness, which is difficult to have when you have been hurt and put down.  The marginalised side needs to be aware of the temptation to seek revenge, and aware of the cyclic nature of revenge, which often leads down the road to further oppression’ (p92-93)
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